My Super Hero Name

One day my boyfriend said he was playing a game with all his friends. The deal is finding your super hero name based on what you’re afraid of, and then your gender. I decided upon Man Woman.

Oddly enough, I do gravitate towards not being that feminine. Sometimes it looks strange when I wear something feminine. Maybe it’s the short hair, I don’t know. It just doesn’t look right.

Most of my pants I got from my boyfriend, and I think they look great as opposed to the current jegging style. I have a pair of generic black ones, and they’re not too bad. Anyways, it’s just a costume.

My superpowers just might be inuition, cleaning up, independence, or my fluid nuetral nature. I’m passively positive, etc.

Maybe I should rename my name Love Woman, Social Woman, or better yet: Awkward Person (lol). Thinking for a long time about it, I’m not really afraid of dudes. It’s just easy to blank out when put on the spot. I know am far from being only one of few who feels anxiety. Maybe you already understand that the most painful pain comes from the inside, even though now I just find myself laughing about odd stuff that doesn’t make any sense.

Maybe I am afraid of everyone in general. I want to give a helping hand to someone who falls down, but I just kinda hover about trying to see if that would be appropriate. It’s terrifying to just jump right in and be like, “Here I’ll help you,” because I know it is very possible I’ll be met with a,

“Leave me alone, I got it!”

And that would be awkward.

Do you have any tips for getting the brain back and working again?


The Journey Begins — The First 50 — Critical Thinking

Thank you so much, to you, the first 50 readers, or so, for taking the time to read some of my writing! It’s great to get feedback and read content related to this practice of writing, indirectly even. I’m learning to edit or delete to make this writing more relatable. I will wait longer to publish (like at least a day) so I’m not changing my article umpteen times, and hopefully it can read somewhat like an interesting personal account of an application of pyschological self help for anxiety. Most of all thank you for the time you put in creating great content! It gets me thinking.

Do the words that I choose bring out the best or worst in the people I care about?

This is an anonymous memoir (well, as anonymous as it gets considering IP addresses and whatever…) Still, I’d like a place to just observe and help motivate myself. I find writing disciplines my mind, in a way, because there is so much to take in consideration.

I like that I can share something briefly and read other’s writing and get a different perspective. I feel like people genuinely want to help and be heard. In return, I’d like to make an investment of time to create something helpful and entertaining. Thank you for your understanding.

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

Not me, though–I’m that one one person that’s not moving at the intersection, probably because I spilled my coffee…but that is not my normal m.o. (mode of operation). 😸

Symptoms of a Vitamin D Deficiency

Have you been feeling under the weather–out of sorts? Here’s a reminder to get outside and go for a 30 minute walk during daylight hours twice a week. This is a article written by Sophia Mitrokostas. Some of the symptoms were pretty surprising:

1. Your last cold held on longer than usual. B and T immune cells have receptors for vitamin D. It helps regulate the immune response. Research here shows that defiency in vitamin D correlates with higher rates of sucumbing to pathogens or having an autoimmune response.

2. Feeling a bit blah now that the hours of sun are very few in number? Vitamin D can help lesson symptoms of depression or blues. And who knows, taking time to get some vitamin D may be another way to burn off those extra holiday calories. Maybe I can escape for a run before the they bring the cake out? Geese, I hope I don’t get amnesia.

3. Are you still tired after 7-8 hours of sleep? These signs include chronic fatigue and headaches.

4. Do you have an achy back? Vitamin D is needed to absorb calcium; calcium that could be used to keep your back maintained.

5. Do you get achy joints after working out? Again, vitamin D helps the body absorb calcium and magnesium.

5. Do you get painful or shaky muscles? Keep your nerve cells happy, particularly those nociceptors, which accept pain signals into the central nervous system. Absorb the magnesium you went out of your way to get to have healthy muscles and less charlie horses.

6. It’s rare that just low levels of vitamin D is causing hair thinning, but maybe part of it. It’s normal for hair to shed a bit more in the fall.

7. Trying to heal from a cut or bruise? Vitamin D helps the body produce the compounds needed to renew the skin. Balance is the key.

I really need to get outside and get some sun XD

Minerals and Subtle Energy

Thank you, Lucid Being, for this article on crystals: Psychic Roads – Crystal Energy To Empowerment.

I would like to speak briefly on my experiences with clear quartz. I keep a crystal in my pocket many times to help me remind me to stay grounded, and to remember how lucky I am. Just think of the thousands of years it took for it to grow underground all obscure and absorbing minerals and energy that made it into a geometric marvel.

Crystals have unique molecular qualities of absorbing and transmitting energy. Though I don’t know how they do it, I do know quartz are used to keep time in watches. I just notice how cold it is at first, and after my hand has warmed it up, maybe somehow my timing is more regulated?

I enjoy watching videos or reading articles about how to cleanse and recharge them (or to set an intention of what to focus on). I feel at the very least they are helpful in getting back to the present moment. And at a higher ideal, somehow I feel crystals keep memories. I could just imagine they have a rough end that is porus, and then the tip and sides are highly reflective sending light out into 12 different directions.

Are you a rock hound? Do you have a pet rock?

What’s Going Through Your Mind? • How Cerebral Spinal Fluid is Created, Functions, and Returns to the Blood

For a moment, let’s imagine the skull as a castle. The system of flat outer bones mortarred together with connective tissues is just one example of the mind’s many physical defenses. The choroid plexus in the center of the brain, and arachnoid granulations hovering around the brain as a sheath make up the blood-brain-barrier (1). Zooming in to this area, there are epithelial cells along the blood capillaries that bring in the rations necessary to rebuild and maintain the brain, and while in good working order, keep out the dangerous and unnecessary contents that potentially rush through veins and capillaries during unfortunate times.

Hormones like testosterone and estrogen can pass through the blood-brain-barrier (2).

Histamines and antihistamines in the blood stream should not enter into the brain. The brain makes it’s own histamines in the hypothalamus (3). Oddly enough though, there is contradicting evidence that this does happen during clinical trials for testing medicines/suppliments (4). I’ve recently added chamomile and more mint tea to my agenda hopefully to counteract the couple cups of coffee I use to get me through the morning. One good thing is it keeps me from drinking too much coffee (which has histamines).

The human brain-brain-barrier (choloid plexus) filters in vitamins from the blood stream. The brain especially needs sugars, proteins, fats, potassium, chloroid ions, bicarbonate ions, water, and sodium (5).

Vitamin C can enter the blood-brain-barrier(6) via a glucose transport when it gives up a couple electrons, essientially becoming oxidized, to become dehydroascorbic acid (aka DHA) somewhere in the digestive process when it interacts with glucose and insulin. Once in the brain, it will be turned back into Vitamin C, aka ascorbic acid (7), but too much sugar (not enough insulin) impairs the amount of Dehydroascorbic acid that can be made (please see diagram from previous link)


Feeling depressed or having problems with inflammation? Please consider, and/or talk with your doctor, about foods and vitamins that can help heal any possible problems with the blood-brain-barrier. I found this link to have particularly helpful information for good food and vitamins and their role in helping one feel better (9). What caught my eye was that they found magnesium and B vitamins help heal a leaky blood-brain-barrier. These vitamins are some of the vitamins recommended for those recovering from alcohol dependency (10) and candida (11).

What other things do you know of that can pass through the blood-brain-barrier (more specifically the choroid plexus)?

Since I mentioned inflammation, this reminded me of a sad movie about a reporter from the New York Post: Girl With the Brain on Fire. It takes you through her story and recovery. This is the dark side of the immune system. Here is the trailer, but if you’re not ready for the suspense and drama, you probably don’t want to watch it. It’s a bit more spooky and strange seeing actual footage of her on YouTube about it.


I finally got 8 hours of sleep this week. Drop the confetti, “Yay!!!” The commons simulated in the unconscious receiving fabrics in my skull had something to say, though I don’t want to agree I have that problem, and I could feel my arms and neck tensing and my neck hurts, probably inflammation from my immunity –I guess. There is still a good lesson in here somewhere, though. The scene was basically driving around the country under the pretence of picking something up before work, I was surprised to end up in town to pick up my son, “How did this road lead to here?”

Anyway, the real value was the song on the radio. I hated it, “You just want my shell…” Blah!…

I understand that we can mentally catagorize ourselves under 3 types of beingness: Mind, body, spirit : father, son, and holy ghost : Higher Self, Middle Self, Animal : Superego, Ego, Id : etc. And they are different from person to person. Some individuals may have a very naughty or angry child self (from neglect or being chastised) that seeks to sabotage the unity, and some people may deny any higher ideals leaving them lost without guidance.

But, here’s something new I learned revisiting Quaker history by reading to my son about it: that we are one whole package, this is labeled as physicality. I never thought about Quakers in my life too much, but I could relate with the quake, and how it makes one a better person. Reading about them, I learned something new–they are named Quakers because they quake at the word of God. They are also interpreters of the bible, meaning, they see it as a guiding words (not a pledge of loyalty) from the inner lights of others. They don’t go by the Bible as literal as the Puritans did.

My son asked me, “Do you believe in God?” He had to ask that because we go to church on occasion to learn something new, but I generally don’t talk about it. But I quickly responded, “yes, but not like anyone might think, that he is so personified, but that it is ingrained in our design. I don’t know about consiousness after death. It makes sense to me that the only reason I am a seeing, thinking, doing being is that I have a body with which allows me to.” And reflecting on my dream, I have knowledge, but apparently something in my brain likes to contradict it. I have no doubt other creatures can pick up on my perceptions through hearing, smelling, seeing, symbols, empathy, and perhaps even psychometry (knowing things from feeling). And we all have these abilities, they just need to be developed through practice and perhaps using a scientific method. But, we probably just use these tools in a much subtler fashion, as intuition, to make decisions of preference or trying to figure out what might have made someone upset.

Doodle Book Prompts (In Progress as of 10/27)

Thank you Carine De Lozier, author of Letters Unsent, for these great idea on what to doodle.

1. Obstacles

2. A dream life:

3. Listen to Your Body

4. Foods That Start With”C”

5. Emotional First Aid

6. Circle Mandala with mindful breathing

7. Recovery is a barn raising

8. The Price of Love is the Agony of Loss

9.Colors of Autumn

10. Fly Me to the Moon

11. My Superstitions

12. Closed Shapes

13. What does grief look like?

14. “Winds of Change”

15. Imaginary creature

16. New medium

17. “My cup is full”

18. Page full of nature

19. Spirals in color

20. Favorite Season

21. Always Tomorrow

22. Boxed in

23. Ultimate bucket list

24. Animal Representative

25. Resilience

Questions to Ask to See How Well Grounded

• What qualities would help you be more patient with yourself and others?

• What do you feel is missing in your support system?

• Do you have your bases covered such as shelter, food, water, and the ability to obtain what you need in times of crisis?

• Do you feel that you need to change anything in your life for your dreams to come true?

As I was reading The Complete Guide to Chakras, by Ambika Wauters, I felt compelled to spend some time answering these questions while listening to some root chakra meditation music. Then, I watched a couple videos I had never seen about balancing this chakra.

Finally, I watched one on transmuting excess/pent up energy into something useful. Those things included aggressive exercise (punching a punching bag), cardio (walking, running, dancing), relaxing exercise (yoga, tai chi, balance, skill) meditation (like observing and letting go of thoughts), doing something creative (abstract painting, music), having fun (climbing, boating…), and meditating on feeling the energy rising back up to the heart chakra.

I like these questions because they get me thinking about the practical things I already know. I can use these questions to intuitively infer how to help myself in difficult situations. And finally, I can see what I need to study to create a more peaceful, structured, secure, furfilling life for myself. And I liked the last video because maybe I’ll think of something like these things to put into my schedule. For now it’s walking around my house minimizing clutter. There really is no limit to the amount of answers to these questions, each one being helpful in different given situations.

Thank You • Steps for Self Respect

Thank you, Carine De Lozier, author of Unsent Letters, for sharing a post of this You Tube video on understanding BPD (borderline personality disorder). I like your blog because it is full of ideas for feeling better. I thouroughly find Katie Morton’s YouTube videos helpful and healing.

Steps for Self Respect

1. Notice times of bad behavior

2. You have the right to remove yourself from the situation

3. We have the right to say no

4. Trust we have the insight to decide what is healthy.

5. Stick with respecting yourself. What do you love about yourself?